Delima

I woke up early today. I had not been able to sleep well for many nights now.Alda's was fast asleep i gently moved a
 bit closer to face her directly. her face looked peaceful i remembered my fathers's word "Theres no peace for the deceiver".
It felt like a lifetime then i got out of the bed and headed for the shower.The hot water on my skin made me remember the
first time i held her how warm it felt nothing ever compared to that feeling.
The noise of the shower woke me up jhon had been restless for the last couple of weeks. Maybe it was the new project
at work he had been talking about. He was barely home these days. Maybe it was because we were no longe the happily married
couple we were four year ago. Nowdays we rarely even talked let alone share our feelings with each other.
        I called up the hotel to book the room for the meeting in advance. I had to make sure everthing was right a lot was
at stake here. Alda was making the breakfast sitting at the table i would ocassionaly steal a look at her through my new york
times she still looked as beautifull as she did six year ago when i first met her It was justlike this i would sit in the
university ground often stealing a glance or two at her beautiull face from the safety of my books every evening until one
day she saw me and smiled back. Even in the early days of our marriage she would often catch me seeing her through my new
york times and smile back but nowdays she never made that effort.
He seemed to be lost in his thoughts so much he didn't even notice his breakfast at the table "You haven't started
eating yet" He loooked at me for a moment and gave an almost nervous smile then started eating. I wondered what he was
thinking about must be his wrk he rarely thought about me these days. I remembered the times how he would come from behind
and wrap me in his arm while i was preparing breakfast for him. and then gently whisper in my ears "I love you". I moved over
to the phone to check for any calls there while scroling through the numbers i saw his number my heart skipped a beat and
all at once a million possbilites emerged in my head the most horific were ones where jhon saw the number or even worse
called back. I heard jhon leave i delted the no and called him back using my cellphone.
She didn't even com to bid me goodbye these days but then again i was only desperately looking or reasons to justify
my own fault. A genle hug or a kiss and a warm chat could easily solve these problem but i had gone past that point long ago
there were to many secrets now. I called up the folorist that the flowers were in place and then the manager to make sure
nothing would destroy my evening today .Cindy my secretary was sitting in the office ready to brief me about todays schedule
but it was the evening i was more interested in.
"you fool why did you call on my house numbers when i specifically told you to never call there " i said in hushed
and angry voice afraid that even the walls, if they heard might pass the word's to jhon.
"Why do you worry so much for him he doesn't cares for you even a little bit, anyways i was just calling to ask if you're
ready for our beautiful evening"
"yes i talked to jhon he'll be holed up in his ofice all night today"
"Good then see you there. i promise you'll love it"
I and cindy left in different cars just so that no one unless they wanted to could know about us. I reached the hotel
half hour early cindy was supposed to head straight for the room .I waited in the hotel lobby for a long time and feeling a
bit hungry i went to the restaurant. As i walked into the restaurent and sat on a empty table suddenly i caught glimpse of
the familiar orange dress, It was alda, sitting with another man on the table. The man was holding her tightly and she looked
sad. I quickly headed for the exit making sure that neither the man nor alda saw me.By the time i reached the lobby i was
sweating profusely and my hearbeats had increased considerably. I ran to my room cidny was already there, ignoring her i
headed straight fot the bathroom and locked the door and looked at myself in the mirror, Her sadened face in he arms of
another man was coming back to me again and again .I fell on the ground and started crying she was going to "leave me" those
two word's were unberable. Cindy was banging on the door asking if i was alright, I told her to leave me alone there was
anger and confusion till the tears came, and once they dried up there was nothing but numbness.
There was a lot of commotion in the room next to me, when i arrived there was wailling sound coming from the room and
a woman with a nervous and apologetic look was clossing the door. I closed the door of my room and tried to sleep for some
time. I thought i heard a knock on my door. I opened up the door, afraid to be seen with him i could not help but peek first.
There was no one around but the same women but this was she was with a man, she was huging and crying on Jhon  and after
a long kiss they parted ways. I slammed the door, How could he decieve me all this time he sidlined me for his work and this
was the work he as doing. How could he betray me how and why? The why suddenly struct me back. i looked around at the room
and suddenly the why started repeating itsel in my head until i could take no more. I lay there on the bed thinking what had
lead me to this point in life cursing every wrong decision hoping i could change them.I could no longer be in the room
that reminde me of my guilt.I left the room and headed for my home and texted michael "i'd be gone maybe forever".
         On my way back the it sarted to snow. I felt cold even through my thick overcoat. Alda was cooking dinner.
As soon as she saw me she came running towards me "Why are you all covered in snow"
She looked out of the door "Where's your car. I didn't haear it". After such long years i felt she genuinely cared.
"Don't tell me you walked te entire way on foot and its snowing outside". Unable to speak and respond i grabbed her and hugged her.
"Bad day. Don't worry honey you'll get over it" and she hugged me even harder. I could feel the snow between us melt away
into warm droplets of water, gently i lossened my grasp and before pulling away she kissed me on the lips. "Go and take a
hot shower you'll feel better".
Jhon seemed broken to be broken, he was never the strong type. I remembered a day before our marraige he called me up to meet
him saying it was very important. Thinking that maybe he was trying to back out and afraid to embaress my friends and family
i immediately went to meet him.He had look of nervousness on his face he looked up at me and i sat next to him. He took my
hand in his and said
"I am a mess alda and i always shall be. What if i sum how end up messing you're lie to? I would never be able to
fogive myself for that. You already know that my financial conditions are not good and i have a ill mother to support
what if through all this i neglect you or bring pain to you"
If i didnt knew him i might have thought he was trying to back out i could see the concern in his eyes.
"Don't worry if you're ever in a mess i shall be there to pull you out"
Now i wondered why couldn't i pull him out of this one and more importantly how did i end up in the same mess.
Under the hot water i remembered the time i had promised myself to take care of her always. It was during
the meeting with her father, I could clearly see the dissaproval in his eyes but i kept quite so as not to spoil
alda's hope who seemed overly excited about it. Two days later when i showed up at her apartment unannounced i found her
crying. When i saw her tear filled face it felt as if someone had stabbed me. The strongest person i ever knew i had
ever seen was lying all broken in front of me. I asked her what had happened. She said
"dady didn't approve of you" I was unabe to say anything did that mean she was going to leave me was that all those tears
were about and "leave me" became more than words for me they became a wound so deep and painfullthat i would rather face
death.
"If it means so much, then maybe we should break up" Even though i knew it would kill me but still isn'tlove all
about sacrifices atleast it was back then. She hit me on the face real hard
"Offcourse it hurts to choose between you and him but how could you give up so easily. I havent given up till now then how can you"
i grabbed her in my arms "I am sorry" i whispered gently but more than that i was happy that she was not going to leave me, that
she was going to be with me. That day i realised how important she was and i promised myself to always take care o this
wonderful treasure god had gifted me with and now i have nearly lost he if not lost her completely
"Lost the love of my life".
At bed jhon i were facing eachother looking at each others eyes for hours. It felt like somehow he knew what i was thinking.
When will you tell me jhon, if you don't what will i do i was jus thinking about i that he spoke
"I have something to tell you"
"I...t.."
His eyes were looking down as if ashame to face mine and even though he didn't speak those word's out i knew what he was going tosay
"I know jhon"
he looked up for a moment protesting maybe even thinking for a while that i didn't know what he was going to say but as soon
as his eyes met mine he unerstood that i knew.
"I to jhon have sumthing to tell you"
He grabbed me and kissed me and whispered in my ears "i know alda i know"
I could not control myself and i started crying after such a long time and this time he was the one holding me and i wondered
why was i waiting for him to accept it first even though i was as guilty as him why?
"Alda it's over and i am sorry.."
Working in a major office buildings reception is a very tedious job. There are a lot of lost people who come for directions
but these two were different anyone who observed them for long could tell the were deeply and madly in love with each other,
the way they held each others hand and the way they looked at each other everything told me so. I remember them specifically because of the strange query they asked
"Hi i am jhon and i am looking for a mr.Gabriels office" The man said.
"Just a minute sir" I entered the name and two names oppened
"Sir which mr. gabriel do you want? There's two of them one is a financial advisor the other a lawyer"
They looked at each other and for a moment seemed lost then the women looked at me and said "The lawyer"
I looked at the screen it read Altosv Gabriel divorce lawyer.